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How to stop relying on others for your happiness

If you’ve been trying to find happiness and haven’t been succeeding, stop and ask yourself this question: are you relying on someone else to bring you happiness?

This can be hard to admit, but if the answer is yes, this has to change. You will only be truly happy when you live for yourself and find what makes you happy. Learning how to stop relying on others for happiness (you can) is the first step in discovering your authentic self. Another important reason why you should stop relying on others for happiness is that you will be putting undue pressure on them. If they are made to feel that you are relying on them for happiness, your relationship might take a hit.

Most people think happiness comes from the outside world, but that’s not true. The truth is, you have to start with yourself. You must realize that it is not possible for others to make you happy. It is possible for others to contribute to your happiness, but it is not theirs to give. Once you do this, your relationships will improve automatically. When you expect someone to make you happy and they don’t, not only are you not happy now, but you’re also disappointed! You might blame them for your unhappiness and it puts a strain on the whole relationship. However, if you don’t expect them to make you happy, all that can be avoided!
In order to stop relying on other people for happiness, you need to take care of yourself first! If you don’t take care of yourself first, how can you expect anyone else to? Self-care means putting your needs first and foremost. You do this by making sure your basic needs are taken care of: physical health, emotional health, mental health, and financial security, education, career opportunities and relationships with friends and family members. Seeking therapy can help you learn to love yourself and learn ways not to depend on others. Here are a few things you will learn in therapy.

    1. Stop expecting others to make you happy.
    2. Take care of yourself first before taking care of others!
    3. Be mindful of your actions.
    4. Learn to accept your own feelings.
    5. Don’t rely on events to make you happy.
    6. Be kind to yourself.
    7. Find a new hobby.
    8. Learn how to say no.
    9. Avoid toxic relationships.
    10. Do something you love every now and then.
    11. Stop comparing your life with other people’s lives.
    12. Get enough sleep.

Alpha & Omega Counseling Center is here to help you find happiness with yourself. Reach out to us today to speak with a licensed counselor to begin your journey of self-love.

-Paulina Cardella

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